Saturday, May 7, 2016

Let’s talk about Ukrainian dating clichés

Dear friends,

Let’s talk about International (rather Ukrainian) dating clichés today. Recently, I have received a mail from one of my readers who accused me that I provide/give false information about Ukrainian women, namely: we are beautiful, feminine, tender and family-oriented.

In fact, in his opinion, the truth about Ukrainian women for marriage is completely the opposite. He wrote me that us, Ukrainian ladies, are lazy and we expect that the man does everything in a relationship. In addition, the reader told me that he had corresponded with over 100 women from the Ukraine, and all the women were the same, namely: they gave off an impression of being lazy, did not respond to him and they showed no interest in developing the communication with the man. He wrote me that (all) Ukrainian women are not usually interested in putting any work or effort into a relationship.

Therefore, I decided to write an article about generalizations and clichés in the International online dating. “Blonde hair, red lips, and a mini skirt” & “an ideal wife, mother and homemaker”- these are the standard images of Russian and Ukrainian women in the West. As a result, thousands of Western men start looking for the ideal woman from Ukraine and Russia each year. Unfortunately, many men become disappointed after a while because they understand some of the Ukrainian dating clichés just do not correspond to reality.

Let’s see what the problem is. As said above, the reader had communicated with over 100 Ukrainian brides through different online dating services – without any success. Now, he thinks that all Ukrainian women are not able to start a happy intercultural relationship with a Western man.

In the first place I have to say that much more than merely 100 single women for marriage live in Ukraine. For that reason, it is simply wrong to think that all Ukrainian women are bad and lazy. I would like to ask you, guys, if you think that all Ukrainian women are the same. Every woman in Ukraine has the same personality? Are all Western men the same? Are all American men the same? I do not think so.

We are making a big mistake here: we all love to make generalizations about everything in this life. We assume that “All German men are cold”, “All American men are superficial”, “All Ukrainian and Russian women are just after my money”, or “All Thai women unquestionably obey the man”. But is that really true? I don’t think so. Western men should understand that Ukrainian women can be brunettes or blondes, good or bad, family- or career-oriented, lazy or hard-working. We Ukrainian women are just different (exactly like yourselves).

Typical woman from Ukraine?
Secondly, it is a known fact that if we make a mistake or have no success in what we do, we always tend to blame others. We cannot see our own mistakes and won’t take criticism from others. The reader wrote me that there is no doubt for him that Ukrainian women are responsible for the fact that he did not find a match in Ukraine. I am rather sure that the man thinks he did everything perfectly, and, of course, the women from Ukraine did everything wrong.

The reasons why over 100 Ukrainian women with whom the man had communicated did not show any interest can be the following:

Boring messages that lack true interest and emotions
Too big age difference (I do not recommend you to look for women who are 20 years younger than you)
Strange behavior of the men (e.g. questions about sex, intimacy, clothing size, etc.)
Misconceptions about the Ukrainian online dating (some Western men think, “I am a Western man and do not need to make any effort to win the heart of a Ukrainian woman. She must be happy if I send a message to her”).
You must understand that Ukrainian women are considered to be one of the most beautiful and desirable women in the world. We can choose, as well. We have requirements to males, as well.

In conclusion, I have a question for you, guys. Why are there so many happy Ukrainian-Western couples in the world if all Ukrainian women for marriage seem to be bad? Of course, there is also the possibility that the Ukrainian-Western marriage will not work. But as you know, not every American (Western) relationship works, either.

I recommend you, dear Gentlemen, not to make generalizations about Ukrainian women and just be adequate with your purposes and desires.

Good luck!

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